Orangely

I started 2010 with a goal – not a resolution – to read at least 52 books over the next 52 weeks. I choose the books y what suits me at the moment I’m finished with the last, so I’m going through cheap paperbacks and NYTimes Best Sellers. I’ve thrown in some non-fiction, too; just whatever piques my interest.

The first book that I read was The Magicians: A Novel. I saw it based on Amazon’s recommendations.

It’s hard  to say that I liked this book; it was really mediocre at best. Through the whole novel I had a, “I’ve read this before,” thought. And for good reason: the book pulls from The Chronicles of Narnia, Harry Potter, and even a little from The Never Ending Story. All good plot lines, and Lev Grossman does a great job of weaving them together, but I still ended with a sense that maybe I should have gone back to the original stories instead of this new one.

Fillory – stand in for Narnia – is a set of books written by Plover, which has the Chatwin children going in and out of the fictional land. Quinten,  the main character of The Magicians, is obsessed with them at the beginning.

He ends up going to a special magical school – a la Hogwarts – called Brakebills. You can fill in most any part of that story here.

The rest of the book contains a lot of Fillory, a lot of alcohol, and a fair amount of sex. This wasn’t a YA novel by any account; which I assumed when I started reading it. It shocked me when things got graphic, but Grossman did a good job of incorporating things without being creepy.

Most of the reviews held it in pretty high esteem, but I guess I really don’t enjoy fantasy novels. I loved Harry Potter and The Chronicles of Narnia, but those were different, I believe. If you enjoy fantasy writing, you might really like this. (6/10)

Alright, I had my fill of mood swings for the passed few days.

Like Enrico said, I should just go with the fortune cookie approach. It’s too bad I didn’t have a chance, because I’m sure my fortune cookie would have read something along the lines of “castrate him.”

Boys (especially the married kind – drama!) are jerks.

There are good things going on in life, like I still have a job, don’t have the swine flu, and I’m not living on the streets. So life isn’t really that bad.

Seeing how it’s time to update the darned thing (like a million years ago), I thought a great way would be through song and dance. Since I’m not nearly brave enough to do such an act, the following phrases will have to do:

I’m fermented. In the good and bad sense of the word. The situation from my previous conundrum has been totally reversed, and I am the tool being used to get some.

Of course it’s with the person that I like. I wanna play the “I saw him first!” Game, but that would just be (more) childish.

I…. just don’t know what to do.

Running away was once just a dream, clouded by poor judgment and laziness. But, dear gentlemen, I have decided to not let that be the case.

To let you in on my little secret, I have ran away. Probably not physically, but you know what I mean.

For specific reasons, please see above.

Emotionally, mentally, and most likely spiritually, I am on hiatus. You see, history (predictably) repeted itself. Except it was only a severe case of like – not love – and the situation fixed itself. To repeat myself, I became a person I didn’t like, manipulating the people around me to get what I wanted.

In one word: skeeze-ball.

Kind sirs, this brain diarrhea is more than just an announcement; it’s a pledge: I will do my best to not use you (insert name here), to get in anyone’s pants. Especially that girl you like (sorry Rob), or the boy EVERYONE likes (sorry Katie).

If the meteorologist could plan my moods – wouldn’t that be awesome – I’m thinking (s)he would predict a lot of melancholy with sprinkles of angst. Luckily we’re out of emo season, but there would be plenty of chance for continued metaphor.

Tonight is St. Patrick’s Day. The start of The Boondock Saints, and the end of… An idea. THE idea, I should say. Of any person having control of me. And, I only have a little bit more time to complete my Lent sacrifice.

Damn coke boy – you ruined every thing.

10. I procrastinate procrastinating. Figure that out.
09. I miss a class… for 4 weeks straight.
08. I have a professor (the same one for two classes) who really enjoys reading student papers.
07. Said papers are due 5 days apart.
06. Intro to Humanites. Eff that ess in the aye.
05. Full time job. ‘Nough said.
04. I loathe homework. All ninety bajillion assignments.
03. I do things like write blog posts when I should be writing papers. I do things like read the newspaper when I should be writing blog posts.
02. GQ called. I have a serious fashion issue.
01. I just got bored. Find me someone else to talk to.

And for you, Mr. Craig, every time (two words… see? haha) I sit down to do something, I think of approximately 87.3 things I could be doing differently. I have a paper due tomorrow. Haven’t started. I’m screwed.